I hate all my clothes; every single item. I wish it was like back when you were a kid and your mom and dad took you school shopping every year before you returned to class in the fall. Why don’t we do that for ourselves anymore? Oh I know why, because we have bills and responsibilities which doesn’t allow you to always be up on trends and fashion.
I used to get so excited to go shopping when I was a kid. There were so many wonderful things to choose from and you got to update everything. New silk shirts, hammer pants, sweater vests, you name it we got it…..not because we were fashionistas but because we grew out of last years cloths and we didn’t want to look like a tool wearing flood pants.
Well damn it, I had a kid and I “grew” out of some of my clothes too. I wanna call my mom and dad and say….hey, I know you are having financial difficulties right now, but you forgot to take me back to work shopping this year. I need a few pairs of slacks (yup…slacks just like grandma wore), bras (since my tits are now sagging down to my bellybutton) and about 5 pairs of shoes (while I was pregnant I was blessed to have my feet grow an entire size so none of my fun, cute shoes fit anymore).
Yeah, I occasionally go shopping for myself, but I feel so guilty doing it. I pick up a beautiful shirt, grabbing hold of the hanger and look at myself in the mirror and think about how hot I would look in this fine cloth….then I look at the price tag. $40 for a shirt!!!!! Shit… I can pay an entire month of electricity for that amount of money. The guilt automatically starts…..and then I decide not to buy it. Once in a great while I’ll actually purchase one of these show stoppers, but by the time I get home I have guilted myself into not taking it out of the bag so I can return it for full refund the next day.
Another thing about shopping now as an adult it that it isn’t much fun anymore. I’m not in the Forever 21 Group….because hello, I’m not 21….so give up the low cut, ass showing jeans ladies…we are old! I'm also not in the Coldwater Creek Club w/ the old lady sweaters and floral patterns bouncing all over the place. So where do I shop you ask…Target mostly and the only reason I do that is because I can also buy groceries and diapers and easily grab a hanger off some rack of a $10 shirt when I walk by it and then wait to try it on until I get home…why?...because it isn’t fun trying on clothes w/ a screaming baby and I know I’ll be coming back to Target tomorrow to buy some more crap that I forgot to get on the 1st trip!....and well…I love Target!
Someday, I will be so far behind on fashion that I will be that girl in People Magazine with the blacked out face with the caption “OUT DATED” with a photo of a hot celebrity next to me who is wearing the newest trend with “LOVE IT” or something stupid like that for the title. My kids will be so embarrassed by my clothing and how I look that they will submit me to be on What Not To Wear and I will win…if you can really win on that show.
Man, if you are my friend…please don’t let it ever come to that!! If I look like a douche, tell me and then take me shopping.
What Not To Wear
Nov 12, 2009
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2 comments:
LOL all SO true! another reason its no fun to shop....everything is SHIT. made cheaply, out of crappy material and then totally over priced! This is why I am still waring some stuff I wore in high school. Sure you say, your lucky after two kids your still the same size you were in high school! HA same size maybe but EVERYTHING has migrated south...and not just for the winter. They have taken up permanant residancey there! Plus to add insult to ingury they wrinkles, rippled and dimpled:O
Which brings me to where I love to shop. TJ MAXX. But you have to be selective because some of their stuff is faulty (not unlike my body) so you end up with a shirt that has one sleeve longer then the other of a pair of pants that one leg is constantly twisting inward. LOL aahh the joys of being an adult. No more school shopping, nope but that means no more homework either....oh wait...there is ALWAYS work to do at home! Oh well at least my boys always look cute:)
Yep! Welcome to Mother'Hood.' I feel so unfashionable!! You will eventually get back into it. Not fully... but a few fun items that you wear only on special days. I watched a What Not To Wear episode a few months after I had Lola and I was like, "Holy Shit, that is totally me." She wore only sweat outfits... like the ones you get at Old Navy...one in every color. Seriously, that is what I did. I had everyone get me a different color for Christmas. I LOVED them! Now, I can't stand to look at them but it is half my closet. I feel old, un-hip, and just plain boring! And of course, Lola looks like a million bucks!
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